Warrior Chemistry

As a woman and mother I am not naturally violent.  In fact, I am usually more passive and seeking peace.  However, I am currently learning to drill for warrior chemistry - the fight or flight response that chooses to fight.  This blog is a warrior drill.

I am being attacked mentally.   It is bedtime, and I have not completed my daily commitments of Power Goals.  Satan is attacking me with "It's late, your tired, you don't want to read your scriptures or write in your journal"  "You are a failure again - you keep saying you are going to do those things early in the day - but you never do."  " It is cold, and if you stay out of bed to do them, you will be awake a long time trying to get warm."  "Sleep is a core value, too"  "It's your anniversary - you deserve to play instead."  "You are so tired, that you can't possibly get anything our of your reading, and your blog will be a bunch of aimless mush."

As I read back through it, I find it hilarious that he tries every approach - completely contradictory ideas - "your too tired" and "you deserve to play instead."  I am committed to these goals and I will not consciously choose to fail!  So there, Satan!  (Can you see me sticking out my tounge!)

Next attack:  While I am writing - keeping my commitment and acting according to my core value - Satan throws another tactic.  "Why is Jonathan talking to me? It distracts me and slows me down."  " He gets to spend time on something fun (he is programming Crossfit for me, at my request), and I have to do these things."  Those thoughts made me feel blaugh.  Tired, discouraged.  It was a chemical shift that I felt.  When I stop to write down those flashing thoughts, I am shocked.  They are simply not true - Jonathan asked one short question about our schedule for the next couple of weeks so that he could program accordingly.  I am sincerely grateful that he is programming for me.  And I am excited about writing this blog and that I still get to write a Letter to God, and study God words in the scriptures.  Those are both things that I value highly as a means of gaining the spirit in my life, and receiving personal guidance in my life from God, who knows all and loves me, and is the only source of truth and happiness.  I treasure time spent with Him, above all else - when I am being true to myself and not stoned by Satan's lies.

My warrior chemistry is on now!  I am ready to give my best effort to these most important things, regardless of the time of day or night.  I am a Warrior!  I am on the Lord's side!